I like to write about things that I have personally experienced, such as divorce, broken hearts, and learning how to accept yourself. I hope that some of you who read my blog will learn from some of my mistakes and you can apply the lessons I've learned into your own life. I've mentioned this before... but my goal in this blog is to help people. I want you guys to know that you are not alone and I hope you all realize that everything I write about on here is things I have gone through or are dealing with. And some of the advice I give is not only to you guys, but also to myself. Because the truth is... I act as if I have it all together, but I really don't. We are all broken in different ways, some of us are more broken then others, and if I can possibly fix another person, maybe I can fix myself too.
So here's something else for you all that I want you to really think about.
If you are ever being treated poorly by a person, I want you to tell them to screw off and I want you to walk away and I want you to respect yourself enough to know when things go too far.
I want you all to know that you have worth. You have worth that you have to realize if you are ever going to be happy. You can't let another person be the judge on how much you are worth because no one has any right to be the one to tell you how much you are or are not worth something. You can't let someone make you feel like you will never be good enough. You can't let someone treat you like dirt because you think you deserve it or because you think you can keep it under control. People who prove you wrong once will just keep letting you down. People who hurt you once will hurt you again. People don't change. They just don't. I used to be one of those people who had tons of faith in the chance of a crappy person turning into a super sweet and caring one, but that's just not how it is. We are who we are and that's just the way it is. You have to stop being so trusting that maybe they didn't mean the stuff they put you through or maybe they didn't mean the things they said or did that made you feel like nothing.
And you know what, I am a complete hypocrite right now. Because I let people make me feel like I'm nothing. And after a while, you start to believe it. You start to believe that hey, maybe I am nothing. Maybe all I'm good for is one night flings. You start to believe it and you let someone take away all your self respect because you think in the end it will be worth it. You think maybe one day it will be worth the tears and the heartache and the wasted time. Maybe this feeling will be worth it one day.
But it's not. It is and never will be worth it. It's easy for someone to look in your eyes and tell you that you are beautiful and then ignore and humiliate you the next day. It's easy for someone to tell you everything you want to hear while they are doing the same thing to plenty of other people. It is so easy for them because they don't care. They don't and they never will care. You may feel beautiful and perfect for a minute, but a minute will never be worth the hurt and embarrassment you will feel after. It just won't be.. so get that thought right out of your head.
Once you feel like you are good for nothing and once you lose your self respect.. it takes forever to get out of that mode. So just keep your standards high. Don't let anyone come along and take that away from you. No one deserves to be used or to be treated like they are nothing. It is one of the most raw and hurtful feelings you could ever feel. I promise you that by having high and set standards it will keep you from so much pain and embarrassment. Sometimes we have to stop listening to our hearts and listen to our brain. Our brains know what's up while our dumb little hearts will beat for anyone who can make us smile.
Like I said before, learn from my mistakes. Know your self-worth and remember that you are worth more than you think. I need to remember that too.
That's all I really had to say tonight you guys. Sweet dreams and I hope this made someone out there realize something tonight.
Xoxoxo,
Always,
Bshawty.
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